so, i guess that's d biggest troublesome question i've always had a problem answering..?!! hahahha...actually, its not that i have trouble answering it cos, i'm trying to hide a relationship or anything like that....its just that ppl dont believe it when i say that i dont have a boyfriend!!
i just dont get it...i wonder if it's written all over my face that i have a bf!! do i look that dependent on a guy??!! i for one am NOT!! i dont believe in hanging on to a guy financially, mentally, or even physically...:p
i've had this problem since God knows when!! i still remember when i was studying in Disted Stamford...i met a girl who was studying there as well (doing comp sc...or something like that...).. we were travelling by the same bus n ferry n all that....cos she's from Kulim...so natrually we met everyday in d morning n evening....but we never spoke to each other for 3 months i think!! thats cos i have socializing problem....:s...i cant easily talk to someone new just like that..i take a very long time to get used to someone n start talking...but am getting better nowadays....hehehhe...
n that girl too didnt talk to me cos she thought i was a proud peacock!! that's another thing which ppl ALWAYS misunderstand n misjudge me for....u know...d proverb "never judge a book by its cover' it very very true!!
getting back to my flash back....so this girl refused to talk to me even when her friends asked her to.....thinking that i was gonna be readlly rude to her....she actually thought i was this rich, spoilt brat with attitude problem.... :s....(i do have attitude at times....but only when its completely necessary...;P ) but then eventually we ended up talking...i dont remember for wat n how....but we kindda got along well....cos we were travelling together almost everyday....
after almost a year.....she finally got d courage to ask me a question which i dread d most!! her exact words were " Lakshmi, can i ask u something?? but u must be very very truthful!! " so, i said ok... n then she asked me this " do u have a bf?? tell me properly...dont lie!! i know u have a bf!!" n i was like...."is it written all over my face that i have a bf??" but that's not exactly wat i asked her though...:p i asked her y she was so confident that i do have bf...n she said that i look like a girl who has one!!!wat was that supposed to mean?? =s ...is it the way i dress up...or is it d way i talk ..? or is it ....i dont know y else!! but i know she's not d only one who has asked me that kindda question....there;s been like hundreds of them i think!!! n more than that who dared not ask me!! cos they think that i'm proud!! hahahha....
even d girls in hostel thought i'm d kind with my nose up in d air.....u know wat...i cant help it if i 'look' like i'm proud , or that i have a bf...or that i have attitude..... that's just d way i look.....that doesnt mean anything about my real attitude....
i've even payed along with a lot of ppl who thought that i have a bf but am trying to hide it....i mean...i told them d truth...but they wouldnt believe me....so, i ended up saying yes...n cooked up a lot of stories....which they actually bought!! hahahaha...i couldnt help it.. 'if u cant beat them, u join them' n it was pure fun!! ( only on my part though) hahahha!!!
anyway, about my status in friendster which says that i'm 'in a relationship'...it was just for d fun of it.....i'm as single as always...i wanted to know how many of my friends n cousins were really observant n concerned about me....well, d results turned out to be kindda disappointing.....
cos, only a handful of my friends realized n actually asked me...some were happy...some were shocked....maybe a lot other noticed but didnt bother to ask....
well, for all of u in my list who've noticed, who havent noticed, who cares, or even those who dont care.....I AM VERY MUCH SINGLE N NOT AVAILABLE...
i am single because i choose to be...(cos i know d consequences i'll ahve to face when my family get to know!! they'll disown me!!hahahah...nah...just kindding...) even if i were to have a bf...i woudlnt hide or lie about it...y should i??!! i'd be very proud of my bf...cos, i'm definitely not gonna end up with some loser guy or something like that.....
so, I AM NOT IN A RELATIONSHIP, I AM NOT PROUD, N I DO NOT HAVE MY NOSE UP IN D AIR!!
it's not fair to judge someone just like that.....it hurts...but it doesnt bother me...cos, it doesnt mean that i'm all of wat ppl think of me...i am who i am...i dont care about wat ppl think of me...cos, it's their opinion...i cant do anything about it....n i cannot n will not change myself just because someone is not satisfied with who i am.....
never judge a book by its cover....that proverb is written just for me!! hahahha
gud nit ppl...n sweet dreams...especially to those who have had sleepless nites thinking that i was in a relationship...heheheh ;)
No comments:
Post a Comment