extra long blog today

i cant think of a proper title for today's blog... initially i wanted to blog about a poem with Trish allowed me to copy... but am in no mood for that at all now....

i woke up feeling very happy n nervous at d same time... there's only 5 more days for my final exams n i have SO much to study!! this 5 days is gonna be like hell for me!! anyway, i spoke to my aunt( who gave me a wake up call n woke me up from my slumber land...thanks but no thanks.. i slept very late last nite.. ) n then i realized that there was more things on my mind other than my exams...

n then got super irritated cos i felt i was made use of, ignored, victimized, ....( watever la...) i dont wanna talk about it... i dont wanna clarify anything ( i'm so sick of clarifying..wat's d point anyway if it happens almost everyday!!) n i dont wanna think about it.. i'll just continue being like how i am now... if anyone wanna talk to me they can go ahead n talk... but i've learnt my lesson... i am not gonna talk anymore ( except to very very few ppl who r willing to give n take ) ... y does it ALWAYS have to a one way thing when it comes to me n ONLY ME!!! that's it!! i've made up my mind already!

i locked myself in my room... n didnt wanna go out or see anyone... but then i had to go to college today to collect my hall ticket...so, i had to force myself to get out of my room... it was a good thing that i went out too.. at least i could get rid of my irritating and sulking mood .. cos i saw many other friends...

n today was d seniors graduation in my college... it was held in d open place cos our audi is still under construction ( i wonder if it'll be ready by next year..!! trust indians to delay everything!!) after i was done with my hall ticket ( which took a LONG time as well.. thanks to d lazy teachers n staff!! ) i went to d place where d programme for d graduation was being held...n am glad i made it for that...( i didnt wanna stay back for it cos i was still kindda moody...i just wanted to go back home n lock myself in my room again )

all my teachers made special performance for d students! thats was so sweet of them!! some of d teachers danced, some sang... a few of them even acted! n trust me, it was hillarious!! hahaha... i had a good laugh!! which did a lot of good for my foul mood... there was a teacher who'se daughter was studying in d same college as well... this teacher dressed up as a guy... n they put up a short drama which involved 2 guys ( female teachers dressed up as guys ) who were looking for love...ahahha!! that was d best performance!! n that teachers daughter was laughing her heart out... ahhaha... hats off to all the teachers

* PS: i still cant think of a suitable title for this blog....

after all that i had to go hunting for a professional courier service to send a photocopy of my passport to my aunt so that she can get d flight tickets for me... i got so burnt today while looking for d professional courier office... as usual...

i was dead tired when i came back home in d evening cos of d sun.. n slept off till dinner time.... i was kindda ok when i woke up.. but not am moody again cos i didnt speak to my mum properly..

even yesterday i couldnt speak to her.. cos d power went off n didnt come back till it was late nite already... even today d power went off but it came back in time for my mum to call.. but unfortunately my mums modem wasnt working!!

anyway, wats d point of being happy n cheerful when something happens and spoils everything! i might as well learn to be quiet and keep things to myself more often now...

i'm losing my temper too often nowadays.. i just cant wait to get out of this place n go back home.. i so wish this holidays was my final year holidays... so that i dont have to come back here again...

i'm getting very fed up with this kindda emotional ups and downs which i'm facing here.... i try to ignore everything n be happy n cheerful... but it doesnt last long...

i;ve made up my mind about another thing also... i dont wanna give a damn about anything or anyone anymore... i'm gonna live my life for myself. like i used to say last time... i CANNOT n i WILL NOT change myself just because other ppl r not satisfied with who i am. i live my life for myself n NOT for other ppl!!!

i'm not gonna let anything bring me down anymore... i only hope i can be this strong hearted when something happens again....

n this is gonna be the last blog where i'm cribbing about something.... i'm dead serious about that!